Stamp Out Rogue Piggies
Although I’m in a great mood, I can’t keep this pesky image out of my mind. I saw something hauntingly aesthetically offensive this morning. To clear my mind for a more single-minded focus on nice things, I’ve crafted this letter.
Hello ladies. I’ve got to tell you that people are noticing when your pinkie toes rebelliously poke out of your meshy, strappy, or woven shoes. No matter how much money you’re spending on pedicures or bunion-removal surgery, or how sexy your sandals are, your feet are disturbing to look at when you have one independently-spirited rogue-state toe confidently reaching out for freedom from the rest of the fleet. For one thing, it looks painful. Knee-jerk empathy makes my feet hurt when I see it. For another, frankly, it looks like a kind of creepy foot tumor. You can choose to make the world a more beautiful place, one well-fitting shoe at a time. Please make the right choice.
posted by Megalosaurus Rudezilla @ Thursday, June 30, 2005
1 Comments:
Hahahaha. This is so true. I am also annoyed at people who wear sandals a size too small, thinking it makes their feet look smaller when the overall profile of their foot-plus-shoe is smaller. But instead of just makes them look like they're on Human Growth Hormone when their heels are sticking out over the backs of the shoes. Buy bigger shoes! We need not be defined by numbers! Ever notice that wearing large pants with a drawstring makes you look skinny? Like a skinny person who dresses sloppily, but skinny nonetheless.
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